The Grace to Forgive

Grace to Forgive - Act 7:60 

Stephen prayed ‘… Lord, lay not this sin to their charge.’, when he was being stoned unjustly. His example was our Lord Jesus Christ who forgave his crucifiers (Luke 23:34).  Both the Lord and Stephen demonstrate incredible grace to forgive. In the journey of faith, someone will offend you deliberately or unknowingly. Someone will let you down, take advantage of you, sabotage you or something else. In the process, you will be hurt sometimes deeply. We should guard against unforgiveness, which provides root for bitterness. Heb 12:15 warns about the devastation of bitterness.  The verse highlights three things we need to know about.

1.                  The Root of Bitterness (Germination) Heb 12:15b – ‘lest any root of bitterness’

The seed of bitterness is an offense or hurt. The heart is the soil on which the seed is sown. Unforgiveness is entertaining hurt and resentment against an offender.  When you do not forgive, you carry the burden of concern and pain about what happened. In trying to imprison the person in your heart, you effectively imprison yourself to them and the past. God wants you to move on. Often the offender is free and may not even be aware you are hurting - like a bird that releases its droppings on a person’s face.

2                    The Result of Bitterness (Devastation) Heb12:15c –‘spring up trouble for you and others around you’. Harboring bitterness is like keeping a snake, in your heart, which bites the one carrying it. Doing so, consumes lots of energy and results in health problems such as high blood pressure and depression leading to suicidal tendencies. Not only does it cause trouble for you but for others around you. Most social strife in families and communities is a result of unresolved issues. The roots are often not obvious and sometimes denied or disguised. The source is often past life rejection, abuse and pain that has festered and smoldered inside. It now manifests as emotional outbursts, anger, insecurity, etc. Not only does unforgiveness create trouble for you and those around you. It creates problems with God. It hinders prayer (Mark 11:25, 26).

3                    The Remedy to Bitterness (Eradication) – receive God’s grace. Heb 12:15a- ‘don’t fail of God’s grace’. a) Know that there is sufficient grace for you to forgive and to move on. b) Face the facts and honestly admit to God feelings like rejection, loneliness, fear, anger, shame, and depression.  c) Give them over to God (1 Peter 5:7; Ps 139:24) in prayer.  Let grace heal the pain. d) Release the offender by pronouncing their release and your decision to let go of resentment. Relinquish the role of control, judge, jury, and executioner and pray for them (Proverbs 25:22). e) Ultimate goal of forgiveness is reconciliation and restoration of broken relationship.  If helpful and possible confront the offender in love for reconciliation (Mathew 5:24). If you cannot say it to the person, say it to God, yourself and/or any other person. f) Forgiveness is an act of faith.  The pronouncement is a decision/event but the healing is a process. Pray as long as necessary for the welfare of the person and hold on to the pronouncement you made before God.  When healed the wounds become painless scars. You remember the offense but not with pain and resentment. g)  Don’t allow what happened in the past to define who you are. You were victimized but you are not a victim. Take responsibility for your past, present and future. As long as you are still blaming others you have not taken responsibility to move on. Even after horrendous things against us, the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ teaches and enables forgiveness of those who wrong us (Math 5:7; 6:12; 18:21-35; Mark 11:25-26; Jas 2:13).

Message by Dr. Kurai Chitima.

Faith Ministries – Johannesburg Faith Life Center.

Ground and First Floors Sunset Bay Building,

204B Bram Fischer drive,

Randburg, Johannesburg, South Africa